Somewhere to review books I'm reading without giving away any spoilers!
I am very pleased to welcome Roxana Valea to my blog today as she has kindly written a guest post entitled If you look for love, look in the mirror first . . . . Read on to discover her advice and to find out more about her and her book, ‘Seven and a Half Minutes’….
“If only I had someone to love!” Sounds familiar? Many of us have been there, wondering day after day what we would do if we only had someone to love!
Well, the good news is that we do have someone to love. We have someone to love even when we’re absolutely certain that we don’t have someone and even when we’re caught up in trying to do everything we can to find that someone. There’s always someone here with us, someone who will never go away, someone who has our best interests at heart and who waits, patiently. Who waits to be recognised and to be given love: our own self.
How many times have we looked for others before we found our own self? How many times have we tried to tend to the needs of others before tending to our own needs first? And how many times have we dreamed of the happy days that will come when we find someone while completely ignoring the happy days we could have at that very moment with our most faithful companion: our own self.
Love yourself first and then you can love others. We have all heard this advice but how many of us have applied it? What stops us? Some of us don’t believe it, some of us believe it but don’t know how to apply it. And others discard this form of self-love and label it as selfish. And yet, what is inside will always reflect on the outside. The love we give to ourselves will translate into love that will come our way. And the same goes for the lack of love.
The Polo Diaries trilogy tells the story of a girl looking for love that ends up falling in love with polo. Does she find love eventually? Well, this is for the reader to find out. But more importantly than the outside love, she finds the inside love. She finds a passion and she finds that doing what she loves fulfils her anyway. It’s quite a trip to get there but she takes one step after the other and gets there in the end.
This series is inspired by my own life. How much is fiction and how much is reality? Well, I’ll let each of the readers take a guess! But I admit to one thing: I had been single for a while and I was looking for love. I was looking for love out there, for the love of a man, I was looking for Mr Right. And fate – because fate comes sometimes to play games with us – decided to play a little trick. It showed me several versions of Mr Right and one new passion: polo. And it showed me that when Mr Right vanishes in smoke, the passion you found is still there to sustain you. And so, I found Mrs Right. I found myself. I understood that I am my own Mrs Right and all that I had to do was treat myself right. And I also understood that the quest for love is internal.
Once we learn how to love ourselves, we find that the previous void we tried to fill with the presence of others, slowly disappears. It gets filled with our own self. We understand that the first and main duty we have is to ourselves. We make ourselves happy. We offer ourselves the things we wanted to offer to someone else. We give ourselves attention and care, understanding and support. And, above all, we recognise that what we’re looking for – love – is already within us.
So next time you’re tempted to look for love out there, remember to take a look in the mirror first. What looks back at you is what you’ve been waiting for!
And if you want to read more about where the search for love can take someone, read the Polo Diaries Series!
Thank you so much for writing this guest post, Roxana!
Here’s more information about the third book in The Polo Diaries series, Seven and a Half Minutes, and about its author….
Seven and a Half Minutes. The Polo Diaries Book 3
Before Roxy found herself “Single in Buenos Aires,” she was a single girl in London in search of true love. The third installment of The Polo Diaries series takes us back to that time, and we follow Roxy as she hires a love coach to help her navigate the dating scene. But the love coach comes up with an unexpected assignment: reconnect to a long-forgotten passion. For Roxy this means horses. Within weeks, she finds herself playing polo, thanks to a series of unforeseen events.
Torn between her desire to become the best polo player she can be and the dream of falling in love, Roxy steps fully into the exciting and demanding world of polo, where injury and recovery mix with hard training, and where celebrating the victory of a tournament comes at a high price. Will Roxy eventually become the polo player she dreams to be? And with polo being such a demanding sport, can there be any space left for love?
Roxana Valea was born in Romania and lived in Italy, Switzerland, England and Argentina before settling in Spain. She has a BA in journalism and an MBA degree. She spent more than twenty years in the business world as an entrepreneur, manager and management consultant working for top companies like Apple, eBay, and Sony. She is also a Reiki Master and shamanic energy medicine practitioner.
As an author, Roxana writes books inspired by real events. Her memoir Through Dust and Dreams is a faithful account of a trip she took at the age of twenty-eight across Africa by car in the company of two strangers she met over the internet. Her following book, Personal Power: Mindfulness Techniques for the Corporate Word is a nonfiction book filled with personal anecdotes from her consulting years. The Polo Diaries series is inspired by her experiences as a female polo player–traveling to Argentina, falling in love, and surviving the highs and lows of this dangerous sport.
Roxana lives with her husband between England and Spain, and splits her time between writing, coaching and therapy work, but her first passion remains writing.
Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/RoxanaValeaAuthor/
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Twitter – https://twitter.com/roxana_valea
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